lundi 3 février 2014

How to reconnect with someone you haven't seen or talked to in ages

Of all the joys in life, reconnecting with an old friend has to be among the greatest. But, after you bump into them and chat for a few minutes, how do you make plans with someone you haven’t seen or talked to in ages?
 
Is it possible to just pick up the phone and call a person without even having crossed paths?
 
In either case, it might seem a bit intimidating – chances are good you both have changed quite a bit over the years, of course – yet it can also be incredibly gratifying to hear an excited voice on the other end of the line.
 
Here are the steps to follow:
 

How to reconnect with someone you haven't seen or talked to in ages
Reach Out

First and foremost, you just have to find a way to make contact. With the wide number of possibilities available – old school, like a phone call, or modern, such as Facebook – there are a myriad of ways to connect. Put aside any uneasiness you might feel and just reintroduce yourself. State your intentions and see what they have to say. You’d be surprised how likely a simple statement is to yield a result. “Hey, it’s been way too long since we talked and I’d really love to have a cup of coffee to catch up” is an easy way to open the door.
 
Set a Firm Date

Chances are good both of you have become more and more active since you last talked. You might have families or work commitments that take up a large portion of your time, so mark out a specific time during which you’ll meet and agree to set it in stone unless there is a health-related emergency. It may seem drastic, but your willingness to make it a priority will keep it at the forefront of your minds. You don’t want to miss this opportunity, right? Then be serious about making sure it comes to pass or it never will.
 
Pick a Neutral Location

Once you’ve agreed upon the right day, finding the best place to meet can be a bit more challenging. Ideally, you want to be somewhere you can carry on a conversation for an extended period of time – or not. Though you may be tempted to go to a restaurant, the cost might be a little too much and the staff is likely to want you gone as soon as the check arrives. What happens if you and your friend are engrossed in conversation? Does that bring everything to a sudden end? If you were to choose a local coffee house or somewhere else customers frequently lounge around for hours, you won’t have the pressure to leave quite as fast. In the same way, a bookstore can feed your chat, if either of you enjoy reading.
 
Don’t Try to Get It All Back At Once

After so much time apart, you might feel like you will redevelop spiritual intimacy in a flash – and, on some level, you probably will. That said, the chances you will go right back to telling each other your deepest secrets is pretty slim, as you must first go about finding common ground all over again. It’s like having a new friend again, despite all the history you have. So, as your first meeting comes to a close, commit to another chat soon – even if only by email or phone, you will be well on your way.

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